


Afraid of the Dark

by Toroto



Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who & Related Fandoms, Doctor Who (2005)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-09
Updated: 2013-12-15
Packaged: 2018-01-04 02:47:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 9,162
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1075635
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Toroto/pseuds/Toroto
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It was quiet. That was the first thing that truly caught your attention.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> There might be more of these if people actually like them. Written on a lazy Saturday when I had nothing else to do.

It was quiet. That was the first thing that truly caught your attention. The silence seemed to permeate the entire world while only the air made any effort to create movement,simultaneously blowing your scarf around like a rag doll. There were very few horns echoing in the distance, no sound of motors running that could be heard. It was simply silent. You breathe in the crisp and chilling English winter air as your hands push farther into the pockets of your far too thin jacket. You weren’t good at this type of winter scene.

You had come from the states. Texas could be lukewarm even during the normally frigid months of December and January. By the gulf, bad weather would be forty degrees and on days such as that, everyone would be bundled up with scarfs, jackets, and gloves as if it was below zero. This sort of weather was enough to make you almost regret the decision to move.

Course, despite the weather being enough to make Jack Frost shiver, there were hundreds of things that were amazing about this city. For so long you had admired the land across the sea. This was your dream place, essentially, to live. Why? Well, honestly, you were never quite sure. The appeal of England was simply hard to deny.

It was hard to leave your family to come here. A whole ocean separated you now and only long distance phone calls could really get you connected to those you left behind… but the sadness was not enough to pull you away from this place. The people were amazing, though a bit more forward than you were used to. The atmosphere was one of a large city and yet it kept a strict hold of its small community feel. You liked how energetic everyone was about what they love. Instead of the small suburbs like you grew up in, you were placed into a community that offered everything you could ever hope to find and more.

It was a nice feeling.

And it wasn’t hard to work here, either. You had gone to college back in Texas, gotten your degree in English and Cinematography. Film had always been something you enjoyed and writing...well, you loved creating something from nothing. Everything you could imagine was at your fingertips when you sat down with a laptop and an open word document. There was no stopping you from building universes and changing lives, if only fictional ones.

This place inspired you to imagine. With its beauty and its people, London was one of the first places you truly felt could be a home for your heart.

While, however, the city itself was normally alive with noise, it was eerily still today. A few stray leaves blew past your feet as you walked quickly back to the apartment you currently called home. The rustle of wind as your walked was the only other sound than your own breathing and the noise of your shoes hitting the pavement underneath you.

There was hardly anyone out, which seemed odd to you in it of itself. It wasn’t that late. The sun had only set about an hour ago and there should at least be cars driving up and down this area to get to other places. It was a semi-busy road for the most part… but there was no headlights shining through the dark at all.

Still, you knew well enough how to keep yourself safe if something happened and what was the chance that anything would happen anyway? You shrug it off as you continue to walk, glancing down at the notepad in your hand. Despite the atmosphere around you, the city and the friends you have made, you still find that your ideas for stories are limited. Why that was, honestly, you weren’t sure.

The sound that punctuated the noise suddenly made you glance up and look behind you. It wasn’t anything necessarily bad but the scrap of animal claws on the ground sounded like a stray dog running somewhere in the dark. You would see from time to time animals digging around in empty trashcans and other than feeling sympathy for them, it never really mattered all that much.

But there was definitely the noises of quite a few animals behind you. Shuffling and low growls issuing from off in the distance, just audible enough for you to hear as you glance behind your back yet again. The street lights didn’t shine on any kind of animal within the distance and there was nothing your eyes could pick up in regard to movement. Still, those were definitely snarls that you were hearing and they sounded pretty animalistic.

The only logical thing was to walk faster. Your apartment was several more blocks out and normally, you didn’t mind the walk itself. It gave you time to think and until you could afford a car, walking simply seemed the best solution to your problems. Who could afford to hail a cab anyway with the kind of salary you make?

You turned the corner of yet another street and the noises continued to follow you. You had definitely begun to prefer the silence that had been around before rather than the creepy suspicion you were being followed. It was just a dog though, it couldn’t be that bad. At least it wasn’t an actual person following you.

It would have been all right for you had not the one growl became two and the two, four. Four soon turned into enough that you glanced back again with growing concern. The was no animal behind you that you could see but you certainly heard them. What was this, a pack of dogs or… what? If there was anything there, why couldn't you see them?

So while you weren’t necessarily scared, you did begin to jog rather than walk. Better be safe than sorry, right?

The panic actually set in when the shuffling noises turned into the sound of full out running animals towards you. Your chest felt heavy as you actually bolted forward, continuing through the dark London streets, looking for someplace to escape into but the only thing that was around here was apartments and other types of homes. Most of the windows were dark and there would be no sanctuary for you there.

So you run. Maybe the animals were energized by the fact that you had actually begun to try to get away from them because the sound of snarls began to grow too violent barking. The noises were getting closer too and that moment was when you start panic turned to fear. But you run. You hardly even notice when your notebook falls out of your hand and it didn't matters to you. Your life was more precious than a stupid notebook. There was the sound of snapping teeth directly behind you and you could feel the brush of something against the bottom of your thigh, right above your knee. You don’t’ even have time to scream. Letting out that noise would mean breaking concentration on getting way.

This wasn’t a horror movie. This was real… and oddly enough, this was never an option that came to your mind when you thought of ways you might be attacked. A mugger, sure... but a pack of animals that you couldn’t even see? Not quite what you pictured.

You glance once more behind your shoulder, just once, and yet, despite the noise, there was nothing you could see. Nothing but darkness and shadows and noise. Your breath caught in your throat and you stumble slightly, tripping over your own two feet and falling to the ground. Almost immediately you feel something dig into the back of your calf. The pain didn’t register right away as you scrambled back to your feet, hands scrapping against the ground underneath you to keep you running. But as you move forward, each step with your right leg sends flared shock waves through your system. It hurt, damn it. The thing freaking bit you. But if you didn’t run… if you didn’t keep running, you were not going to be able to avoid the next bit or the next slash of claws. So you let the adrenaline keep you running.

You aren’t even close to home, however. You weren’t going to make it.

You were going to trip again and you were going to get eaten by invisible dogs.The logical part of you knew that even if you did make it home, by the time you stopped and got the door open on your apartment building, the things would be on you. Right, a perfect way to die. It was inevitable. There was no way you could keep going like this.

Your breath was short and ragged from the running and you were not going to be able to keep up this sprint. You had long ago lost all thoughts except to run and the only thing that there was left to worry about was keeping this pace. You couldn’t do it though; you knew you couldn't.

But just as you were expecting the darkness to come at you and take you over, it ended completely. Hand wrapped around you and pulled you into someplace bright. You couldn’t keep your balance and the ground was ultimately where you ended up. The sound of a door shutting followed not even a second later. What th-

“Sorry, sorry! Are you alright?” A voice came from beside you. It was warm, certainly British, and full of concern. However, it was also not a voice you had ever heard before. You were pretty good at knowing the voices of your friends and this… this wasn’t anyone familiar. Or maybe it was and the shock was getting to you. But it was certainly nervous.

You glance to the side, eyes fixing on a face that was a bit to close for normal conversation but you didn’t really acknowledge that at this point. It was a man who was sitting beside you, crouched on the balls of his feet and peering at you with a rather odd expression. He seemed both excited, happy, and anxious on your behalf.

Were you alright? That’s a good question. There was a set of doors in front of you and they seemed to rattle every now then. There was whining from behind them and the occasional growl but there were doors between you and that thing. Wherever you were, at least there were doors between them. How did you get here though? One minute you were running, the next... here. It didn't quite make sense.

“I’m… fine,” You breathed out quickly, letting yourself catch your breath as your chest screamed for air. You hadn’t realized you had been holding your breath up until that point. You were safe. That was enough to know for the moment.

Your leg, however, was calling for your attention. With a visible wince, you glance down at the back of your calf, turning your body slightly from where you were sitting to see the lines of blood red that soaked through your jeans. The material was torn and when you moved to push it to the side, you had to force yourself not to groan. “Damn it…” You whisper quietly to yourself, moving the material to way to view the slashed puncture wound. “Apparently not so fine.”

“They got you well, didn't they? I think I have some stuff that can help that if I haven’t misplaced it. I’ve never actually had to use this before. First time for anything I suppose,” The man said, standing up and walking to somewhere behind you. You didn’t bother tracking where he went, you were to busy closing your eyes and gritting your teeth. It had been real, hadn’t it? That had been real. The shuffling at the door showed that it was but even then, it was hard for you to believe.

Those things… they hadn’t been dogs. You would have at least seen them if they had been there. You would have seen something. There were street lights you were sure you ran through but there had been nothing but darkness around you. In fact, if it wasn’t for the fact that your leg felt like it had been cut up with knives, you might not believe it still. The adrenaline had kept you running, pushed the pain away, but now it was coming up full force. The pain served as a reminder that what just happened was real.

The man was back in a moment with what appeared to be a first aid kit in his hand. Not the kind you would imagine, however. It looked old, the box seemed to be from hundreds of years ago and when you glanced up at his face, he gave a sheepish smile. “Best I could do. Now, let me see that leg of yours. Is this the only place they got you?” He looked actually impressed as he moved forward to peer at your leg curiously. When you nod, he gives you a glancing look of admiration and you somehow feel somehow as if praise from him was worth far more than any compliment from someone else. Why you felt that, you weren't sure.

“Not many people can outrun a Vashta Veradena, how did you even manage it?” He seemed to be talking to himself so you don’t answer. Instead you wrap your arms around your stomach and close your eyes. Whatever the man was saying, you tried not to pay attention to it. Neither did you focus on the fact that there were fingers slipping into the hole in your jeans and ripping them open enough for the wound to be cleaned. You hold back from flinching away as cold yet careful fingers rub something over each mark.

“You managed to outrun them _and _the wounds aren’t even very deep…” The stranger said this again and since you didn’t open your eyes, you weren’t sure if you were being spoken to or if he was talking to himself yet again. The thing he put on your leg stung but the cold against your skin felt vaguely nice. A moment or two later there was gauze being tapped over the bite marks. “I’m actually being a doctor now. The irony of it. “ He gave a laugh as he sat back on his heels and looked at you.__

__You finally get your tongue back enough to ask him what had been pressing on your mind. “What were those things?” He obviously knew because he had named them. Whatever it was, you needed to know what you had been running from._ _

__“Vashta Veradena. They are being made of shadows that take the form of dogs. Similar to things called the Vashta Nerada but they hold a grudge more. You couldn’t see them because they were actually just darkness in darkness.” He said this casually, still leaning over you and this time, glancing at your face with a curiosity that you didn’t understand. As if those things out there didn’t scare him but you… you fascinated him._ _

__“Right. Shadow dogs. Gotcha,” You mutter under your breath, not quite believing him but somehow knowing that what just happened and what he explained fit together perfectly. But your brain immediately served to remind you that shadow dogs don’t exist. That is simply something you would write in a story of yours, not in real life. But it had happened. That had _happened_. It wasn’t a story, it wasn’t something you had imagined so while logically you might not believe him, you are forced to accept it._ _

__You nod slowly and he is still watching you. You feel almost as if he is reading your thoughts and noticing your slow change from disbelief to honest acceptance. It only seemed to make his eyebrows raise slightly and his lips to purse._ _

__“What, no questions? No ‘How could you know that’? No ‘Why were those things after me’?” He asked after a moment, running a hand through his hair as he gives you a smile. His hair was odd, slightly spiked as it curled upward and dark brown. You aren't sure why you notice it specifically but it fit his face._ _

__You hold up a finger and give him a slight smile in return which seems to settle him slightly. “I’m trying not to panic on you. Give me a moment.” You stare as the door rocks one more time and it is clear that whatever is out there isn’t getting through. Your moment is over all to quickly as you push yourself up onto your feet, wincing as you do so. The man had jumped to his feet immediately, trying to help you, but by the time his hands reach to help, you could simply wave a dismissing hand at him._ _

__The first thing you do when you stand up is turn around. The room was large in it of itself but that wasn’t what caught your attention. This place… this wasn’t natural. A console of some kind sat in the middle of the room up a set of grate stairs. There were pillars of that looked like trees reaching from the floor to a slopped ceiling and the walls had rounded glowing circles of decreasing sizes from the floor to the ceiling. Not natural at all nor was it like any place you had ever seen before._ _

__Another small “Right then” slips from your mouth as you blink and rub a hand over your mouth briefly. This is totally normal. You have _no_ problems accepting this. None at all, no never. You keep your calm as you glance at the man one more time. He was looking sheepish again as if he was trying not to be overly proud that he caused you to look so shocked_ _

__“I think I know the answer to one of those questions now,” You state without any doubt in your voice, glancing at him with a new mindset. This wasn’t natural. None of this was. There was no possible way you could go from running in the dark to standing inside this… this control room without something else being involved. Something odd, something alien, and while you never really thought about things like this other than the subject of stories, you had no reason to doubt what you saw now._ _

__“You do?” He asked curiously, glancing at you with a raised eyebrow yet again, his mouth turning up into a slight smile as he moved to jump up the set of stair to stand by the console in the middle of the floor._ _

__“You know about those things because you aren’t from here. You’re an alien...right?” You aren’t insane, you know that. You never thought those words were come out of your mouth but you were logical enough to abandon logic if necessary._ _

__The man’s smile split into a grin as he looked at you and opened his arms wide. “Good guess, first to get it without any questions! Welcome to the T.A.R.D.I.S!” He sprung down from the console, not even bothering with the steps, and the tail of his brown trench coat flapped up slightly as he did so. “I’m the Doctor, pleased to meet you.” He gave a fake bow in front of you and you didn’t bother to wonder if this was normal behavior. You knew in that moment that it was. “And what should I call you?”_ _

__“______” You say after a moment, running a hand through your hair as you try to take a step forward and deciding that if you were going to move at all, it was best done with a limp._ _

__“______, fantastic name. Brilliant.” He says almost immediately. You didn’t bother asking what kind of name Doctor was. It was strange, just like this man was, why out of everything would you ask about his name?_ _

__You don’t talk much at first as you inch forward, making your way up the stairs. It’s not like you are the quiet kind of person, it’s just a lot to take in and he seems to accept that. You actually can feel the fact that your mouth is open in a slight shocked expression. Stupid expressions, giving you away._ _

__“I wasn't doing anything out of the ordinary. Just walking home… why would those things come after me?” You finally ask, glancing at the man who was fiddling with something on the console._ _

__“Probably just because you were convenient,” He glanced up at you with a sad expression. “They don’t attack people without one reason or another, food, protection, fun..., well I suppose that isn't a good motive but either way they are hardly ever on earth.” He seemed to be holding something back, something he was specifically avoiding saying and you cross your hands over your chest._ _

__“What? What aren't you telling me?” He grimaced slightly before flipping a switch on the dash. You deserve to know though, don't you? The entire room began to make a groaning noise, echoing in your ears. “They were probably trying to find me. They figured the best way to get to me was through someone else.” So it hadn’t been your fault that those things were there. You had simply been bait. It was almost a comforting thought... if it weren't so horribly sadistic._ _

__“Which was why you were surprised I was basically fine,” You summarize during the Doctor’s hesitation._ _

__“I wouldn’t expect someone to just put together what’s happening enough to keep out of their reach for that long. I didn’t think I would have gotten here in time.” He nodded, running a hand through his own hair and letting out a quick breath of what might have been relief. “How did you know that you needed to run?”_ _

__You shrug slightly. It didn’t make much sense. “Something didn’t feel right. I heard what I thought was dogs following me but I had a dog as a kid. When she snarled, it was usually in defense of herself. It was when she growled that something startled her. However, if she did both, you were in trouble.” The labrador had only once ever made noises like that on the day that their home had been broken into when you were a child. By the time Dad had grabbed a gun and run out, the dog had driven the man off. She had quite literally chased the man out of the house and into the street till the man had run off completely. “They were not trying to defend themselves and they weren’t startled so obviously there was reason to run.”_ _

__The logic seemed to be accepted with another smile and a nod. “Good, right, smart! Very quick on your feet. Right, now hold onto something.” You barely have time to register the fast spoken words and grab onto a railing next to you when the man pulls down a lever and the entire room begins to shake, tipping sideways and backwards. It’s like the entire place is moving and the groaning noise was near deafening compared to what it was before. However, you couldn’t help but let out a laugh of surprise at the same time the Doctor gives a whoop of joy. He did this on purpose, obviously, and was enjoying every moment of it._ _

__Your own laugh mix with his as the room settles back to normal. The man gives you a grin before running towards the door. “Come on then!” He moved forward and opened the door wide for you. Your initial thought was why the dogs weren’t entering right away and you stare at him in confusion as you move down the stairs slowly. He seemed to forget that walking right now was incredibly painful and he gave a small grimace as an apology as you wince. He must always be on the move, the Doctor... or he wasn't used to the people he was with being hurt because the slow pace you walked at seemed to bother him a bit._ _

__When you step out of the room, the first thing your eyes lock onto is your apartment building directly in front of you. The Doctor had taken you home. You were sure, however, that you had been nowhere near home when you had been snagged from the run. Turning around, your mouth opened to ask how that was possible when the sight before you surprised you entirely. It really shouldn’t have shocked you, knowing what you know now, but it did all the same. The Doctor was leaning on the doorframe of a police box, the area inside the door showing the large room you had just left. His expectant grin was in place as he watched your surprise and he seemed almost giddy with your reaction._ _

__But at that moment rather than snorting out indignation at his expression, you were just trying to process how the hell that was possible. How the hell could the giant room you were just in... fit in a police box? You step forward and round the box, hand touching the wood material as you look behind it. It was definitely a police box, there was no doubt about that. It was small and fairly old but unlike the kind you would notice around the streets, the paint was not completely faded and there was not any type of graffiti on it. This obviously wasn't _just_ a police box but for a space ship, it was good at camouflaging itself. You return to the front of it, hand covering your open mouth as you stare at the box, the Doctor, and the inside of what he called the T.A.R.D.I.S._ _

__“It really shouldn’t surprise me that it’s bigger on the inside. It really _should not_ surprise me at all,” You state with a shake of your head and a small smile. You wave a hand in the Doctor’s direction. “Of course you would have a space ship. The alien theories can’t be completely untrue.” You laugh finally, pinching the bridge of your nose. It was almost too much to believe but all to amazing at the same time. “I got saved by an alien in a spaceship. Maybe I should write a story about that.”_ _

__The Doctor just continues to grin as you stand there taking it in until finally there is just silence between you and him. You were the first to break it. “I suppose I should say thank you then, for saving me.”_ _

__“You would have been fine without me, I think,” The Doctor responded, shrugging off the thanks “You were handling yourself pretty well up until I got there.”_ _

__“Not for long. One more trip and I would have been dog chow,” You say with frown. It would have been the end of you. You would have died. That kind of shock hadn’t hit you yet but you would deal with it later. “So thank you, really.”_ _

__You nod to yourself once, slowly, before looking back at your home. “I should…” You point back at the building behind you with a sad smile. You were already taking up to much of his time. The man had just rescued you, saved your life… but you also were keeping him here when he probably had better things to do. Alien things. He had taken you home for this reason, obviously. That was why you were here. He would want you to go._ _

__But he looked sad the moment you spoke of going back to your apartment. His face fell from that curved crooked smile to something almost lonely._ _

__“Right, I suppose you should,” He agreed though he was looking away from you now, off into the distance, and he seemed to have aged years with only those two words you had spoken._ _

__“Doctor,” You say quietly, watching his eyes turn back to you again as you give him a grateful smile. “Thank you, again. I owe you one.”_ _

__He tried to smile and nod, though it didn't seem to reach his eyes, before he turned into the police box. Giving you one last glance over his shoulder, the door closed. You simply stood there for a moment or two, watching the police box, before you turned to walk up the steps of the apartment and open the door with the key you always kept in your pocket. The sound of groaning gears and wheezing made you glance over your shoulder as you open the door, watching as the police box began to disappear from your eyes. It faded to transparency and then completely disappeared as if it was never there at all._ _

__Aliens. You shake your head slowly and move inside, limping slowly forward and moving towards the stairs. It took you a while to climb up to your actual apartment and to open that door. Your leg had begun to grow numb from whatever the Doctor had placed on it and all you felt was tired. As soon as you were in your home, you made your way to your bed. Shock did that to people, made them want to sleep it away and you were no exception._ _

__Still, as you laid in bed, you couldn’t fall asleep. The lights were on and that might be part of the reason but you could hardly stand your bedroom being dark right now. Your brain tries to wrap around what happened to you today and sadly you fail miserably to even process half of it. All you can think, _really_ think about is the sound of the T.A.R.D.I.S wheezing as it disappeared and those hands wrapping around you to pull you out of danger. Somehow, you wanted more than anything to see the Doctor’s smile again. You want to thank him one more time. You owe him for what he had done._ _

__But instead, you fall asleep. Not on your bed as you would have hoped, but on a chair you pulled up to the window to stare up at the sky and while London hardly had the type of sky to see the stars, you could have sworn as you drift away you see just one hovering over the sky above your roof, watching over to make sure nothing was coming for you again._ _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Someone mentioned this and I felt it would be good to post my explanation in the actual work. 
> 
> As for the Vashta Veradena, I haven't quite described them as I wanted. The creatures themselves are adaptations Vashta Nerada. They specifically came from the same world but during the years of waiting out on that planet, they became animalistic. It only makes sense, however, that even the silence would begin to bother them and after living around essentially their own people's dead corpses, one is bound to be driven insane. Explorers came to the planet in my headcanon after the Doctor and instead of killing them, the Vashta Veradena specifically didn't kill them so they could go to another world and feed. They became animals, specifically taking the forms of carnal dogs in some cases, bears in another, and feral cats. If it had been light, the reader would have noticed the creeping shadows but seeing as how it was day, they had no opportunity to. As the Doctor said himself in the shows, Vashta Nerada are creatures living in shadows. It is why, he said, that people have a logical fear of the dark. Vashta Veradena and Vashta Nerada are not specifically darkness itself so I couldn't have them completely taking over the reader as even the Doctor was able to outrun them in the episode. In this world, this is what people would imagine hellhounds being, I suppose, but that is certainly not what they are. Different characteristics, no master, different signs, and they actually physically look like the creeping form of shadows when it is light.But they are specifically creatures that eat flesh from bone, not just tear and shred. If I write more, and I might, I have a plan to explain these creatures more. They were after the Doctor for a specific reason in my head and I knew what it was. It just didn't fit into the story right away.


	2. Wondering

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> That is all humans were really. Just a number. They might think they were important but to others, they were one of just a very large expanse of digits. They might think they were making a difference but to others they were just a face in the crowd.

Life seemed almost dully normal now. Days passed, time moved forward at a sluggish pace, and each moment seemed to be sub average. Not that you were wishing yet again that something would threaten to kill you. You were glad to have your life not verging on danger and death. But despite everything, life seemed to have taken on a boring quality to it all.

You had woken up that morning thinking it was all a dream. Your seat had been pulled up to the window and you couldn’t help but shiver at the lack of warmth in the room. The window had clouded over in the middle of the night but when you whipped away the fog there was no sign of a blue box by the front doors. It could have logically just been a dream. A fantastic, wonderful, terrifying but brilliant dream that your subconscious had managed to create. You had dreams like that every now and then and usually those dreams were turned into stories.

But as you stood up from the chair, you nearly fell on your face from the way your leg buckled in pain. Your eyes had darted down to your leg, still wrapped up in padding, and you knew then that whatever had happened last night had been real. The Doctor, the Vashta Veradena, the TARDIS… those hadn’t just been figments of a writer’s imagination. They had been real.

For the next few days you would catch yourself glancing out the window of your apartment building or your work room. You knew it was foolish but your eyes would always scan the area to see if there was an average blue box where it wasn’t supposed to be. Of course there never was one. Foolishness, that thought. The Doctor wasn’t going to come back for you. You had said your goodbyes, obviously, and in all the world, all the universe, all of space, how likely was it for you to see one man again?

Life was boring now. You found there was no excitement in anything you did anymore. What, with the whole universe being opened before your eyes simply by one fateful encounter, how could you go back to shopping and eating and smiling in polite conversation? It wasn’t as if you were wishing to be whisked away by some alien to see the stars… it just… the life you lead didn’t hold much meaning to you anymore in light of the new information.

There was nothing you could do about it either. You still had to go to work to earn cash for food and shelter, you still had friends who would call you simply to talk. What were you supposed to do? Stop everything you once did and search the stars for this man who saved you? You had to remind yourself over and over that you had been the first to say goodbye. Why then did you feel like you didn’t belong on earth anymore? Like the only thing you wanted to do now was see exactly what was beyond this atmosphere?

The only thing that you found that helped was to write about the encounter. You had searched for inspiration for so long… and now that you had it, you didn’t seem to be able to stop writing out. You wrote the story of your experience, about what you had felt, about him... but you wrote it as if it happened to someone else. As if you, the small tiny insignificant human, could never dream of having something this stunning could ever happen to _you_. Something this different had to happen to someone more important than you. You spun a tale of the rescued and the rescuer, the valiant savor of worlds and lives. You knew half of what you had said in words probably wasn't exactly what happened but your imagination took over the story and there was nothing you could do to stop the words from coming.

So you wrote the story of the Doctor.

At first you were hesitant to let anyone see it at all. People would ask what you were working on and you would push them away so that no one would read the words that were only meant for you. Eventually, however, you let one person at a time read the story of what happened… watching as they grew to love it, never realizing who the character really was. That the character who had outrun monsters was you.

They asked for more stories, for more adventures of the Doctor. You found it hard to fulfil their requests though. What were you supposed to write about? This was your adventure but when you had said goodbye that adventure had ended. Anything more written would never match the stark reality of what had happened. It would simply be figments of your imagination and anything your imagination could conjure would be nothing compared to the real thing.

So you were once again stuck in the same situation as you were before though now, instead of being trapped in writers block, you were impeded with the dilemma of whether to keep your little story based in truth or rather imagine more than ever actually occurred.

You were faced with this issue… and for months, you were not sure how to face it. Your leg healed slowly as you moved about your day, continuing on your routine schedule as if nothing spectacular had happened to you. People had asked about it at first and you had just told them a dog had gotten at you. It was the closest to the truth you could give without seeming insane. The people in your life wouldn’t understand… they would think you had lost your mind if you told them what really had happened to you.

Christmas came and went without much event. You flew home to your family and spent the holiday with them. Seeing them had been nice and for a few days, you almost forgot about the Doctor and his flying TARDIS. You almost forgot about the dogs and the run of your life. But eventually you had to leave the safety of your childhood home and you were forced to remember yet again what had happened.

January, February, and most of March passed before snow began to dissolve into green, into life. You watched as the white world became one of blooming color as the weeks passed. It was not the warmest spring you had ever encountered but there was life around you again. You took to walking through the parks that littered the outskirts of the city. Hyde Park quickly became your favorite out of all of them. You would come here and sketch, hoping to forget for a moment that everyone else existed except you and the nature that surrounded you. You were never the best artist but it took your mind off the constant _wondering_.

It was the most peaceful around sunset. The street lamps would flicker on and there was a beautiful setting sun of green trees around you that would distract you from everything else.

That was where you were now. Sitting on a park bench, hand crossed over your chest to keep yourself still, you watched the world around you change from one color to another. Water spread out before you, and the lake rippled from the slight breeze that was blowing the park. Your eyes closed quietly as you breathe in through your nose, letting your lungs fill till they couldn’t hold any more.

Why was it so hard to forget? Why should it affect you so much? You met an alien, you realized that there was more out there than you ever could have thought possible, and you returned to your old life. It wasn’t as if you could pretend that nothing had happened but… but you still held your breath every time you gazed up at the sky. You knew now that there were people looking back at you when you did stare upward… and you couldn’t feel the same way as you did before.

You weren't immune to the beauty of Earth, despite all that had happened. There was more appreciation in you now for the setting sun and the wind that blew the trees. This place, this moment in time, was unique in the world. No one would ever be able to replicate it again. It was completely and totally yours. This instant in this reality was never going to happen again and you were living a life that only you would ever experience. Unless there were parallel universes where everything happened exactly the same way, this moment was yours alone.

You smiled to yourself as you shook your head, pulling your legs up to rest on the bench as well. The wind blew at your hair, pushing it in and out of your line of sight ever second or two. The sun continued to set before you, winking at you through the tree line as the sky turned from blue to orange, red, and yellow. The sky grew darker with each moment but you could only continue to smile to yourself and watch as the last of the sun disappeared from view. Sunset and twilight was really only the difference between beauty and stillness.

Taking one last look upward, you shake your head. No stars shown for you in the London sky. This wasn’t the place to see it and the empty expanse of darkening blue above your head seemed almost like a cage. It was trapping you in this world forever.

As you stand, you let the soft sigh pass your lips and a frown to touch your face. That was always the problem with watching the sunset. Every time you sat down to stare at the beauty, you were forced to face the reality that eventually it would leave, eventually you would have to face the growing starless night.

Hands pushed into the pockets of your thin jacket as you walked down the pathways of the park, through lights of lamps that were periodically placed around the sidewalks. There were people still out, walking past you every now and then. Joggers tended to run these trails and you were content to walk behind other couples holding hands or mothers walking their children home from playing in the park.

You kept your head down for the most part but every now and then you would glance up and gaze at the faces of the people who filled the earth around you. That is all humans were really. Just a number. They might think they were important but to others, they were one of just a very large expanse of digits. They might think they were making a difference but to others they were just a face in the crowd. There were so many people on this earth and none of them really made all that much of an impact. Not on the grand scheme of things. The only people that humans affected were other humans.

But you liked looking at their faces and knowing that at least in that moment, you were paying attention to them. At least in that moment you were picking them out from the crowd and giving them a smile. There wasn’t much you could do for humanity as a whole but at the very least you could give them that smile and a small nod.

The sun continued to fade away as you walked forward, moving now by the lamp light more than anything else.

Your eyes stared at the ground a few feet in front of you and you try not to think about being small. About being as tiny as an ant to the rest of the world. It was hard, but you succeed well enough. Instead you hum a tune of no consequence and you let yourself relax as you walk. You might not be able to get your old life back but at the very least you should get used to this new one. A different worldview wasn’t going to kill you… not if you could adapt to it rather than fighting for your old perspective back.

The only problem with relaxing was it made you less observant. So as you stare at the ground, glancing left just a little as someone begins to walk stride to you in a brown trench coat and converse, you almost don’t think about it. You just keep walking, gazing at the ground and humming to yourself.

But you wouldn’t be _you_ if you don’t remember eventually, if you don’t still for a moment in walking and glance up at the person who had paused as well. You would be have to be someone else entirely not to at least look.

Normally every brown trench coat or spiked brown hair would make you do a double take. It had always lead to nothing but a feeling of disappointment and a sheepish smile if the person caught you staring. This time, however, there was no raise of a person’s eyebrow, there wasn’t a roll of their eyes.

There was simply an expression of delight and a grin from the face you had been thinking about for far too long.

“Doctor” You found yourself whispering underneath your breath before reaching up to rub at your eyes in the most childish way. Your eyes pinch together as your fingers rub at the corner of each of your eyes. The only thing that came easily in that moment was disbelief. There wouldn’t be the Doctor there when you opened your eyes, you told yourself. There would simply be some stranger in clothes similar to his.

But you were wrong yet again. Your eyes open and he is still standing there, grin widening at the shock that you were sure was on your face. You weren’t sure what to say, honestly. What couldn’t you possibly say to this alien who you couldn’t get out of your mind for the last four months. There were was no words to describe the feelings that was running through your system and your thoughts were not coherent enough to make even a decent attempt at processing that he was here. That the odds somehow were in your favor and out of all the possibly ways your life would go, you met him again.

“I see your leg is better now! Good, good, I timed it just right then. Sorry for just running out on you before but I figured you needed some time to rest.” He said this all completely casually, as if there hadn’t been months between when you and he last spoke. As if not even a day had passed on his part. But no, it had been months. Months were you had thought about what was out there, months were you stewed over the things that you were never going to see. It had been months.

“You’re… How… Why?” You manage to stutter out, any resemblance of calm disappearing as you gaze at him. Why was he here? Why had he come back? Were you in some kind of danger again or something because otherwise you couldn’t even imagine why this man would come back here. It wasn’t an accident either, by his words. He had come back to you on purpose.

“Why? Well every doctor has to check up on his patient every once and a while, right? I might not be that kind of doctor often but I must follow protocol.” He shuffled back and forth on his feet, looking quite proud of his logic. You heard it for what it was though and that shocked you more than anything. It was an excuse. He was using a stupid excuse to come back and see you. You could feel the stupid grin on his face begin to be mirrored on your own.

“I guess you’re right,” You find yourself saying, glancing down at your leg. You still kept a bandage on it as it stung to have it rubbing against the material of your pants but you could walk easily now and run fairly well. “You must be some doctor, Doctor. It shouldn’t be healing as well as it is.” It would have logically taken a year or so for the wounds to really be patched up.

Your words seemed to please him because his eyes twinkled even brighter than they had before. He bounced on the balls of his feet as you stood there staring at him and he seemed to accept that fact that you needed time to adjust. It was about a minute or so before he actually asked a question. “So… how long has it been? For you, that is.” His eyes squinted slightly and he glanced away to something in the distance you couldn’t see.

“About four months now since you left…” You trail off, teeth gnawing your bottom lip as you bite off the words that you almost said. _About four months now since you left and it hasn’t been the same since then._ But even as you stop the words from coming out, he seemed to understand what you were saying anyway.

“Right. Sorry about that. Bit abrupt I suppose,” He apologized but you didn’t deserve that apology. He didn’t seem like the type to stick around and explain everything and you shouldn't expect him to. It was probably more natural for him to explain only what you need to know and then disappear into the wide empty universe that spanned above the Earth’s atmosphere. But no, you didn’t blame him for leaving. It was probably in his nature.

But you do wish you could get him out of your mind. After he left again, you were going to have trouble going back to your normal life yet again. You were bound to continue to wonder what was out there waiting.

“You look tired,” He mused suddenly, pointing out what you already could feel in your bones. You didn’t sleep quite as well lately. The darkness was not your friend anymore and though as a child you used to think of the most wonderful stories when it was dark and quiet, now all you could see in your mind’s eye was ravenous dogs coming towards you. Packs of wolves made of shifting darkness that blended in with the night.

You shrug slightly. “Too many thoughts to think, I suppose. You left me with a lot to wonder about,” you answered easily because that was true as well. The monsters might keep you up but the thoughts were what stopped you from falling asleep even in the daylight hours. Eventually your mind would give out from exhaustion and you would sleep but those were normally punctuated by nightmares. You would far prefer to stay awake and wonder than to sleep.

“Wonder? About what exactly?” He asked curiously and though you were highly confident that he knew the answer to his own question, you answered him anyway.

“About everything. About what was out there, about what everything that I don’t know. There must be worlds out there that humans will never hope to see, places we will never be able to experience, and creatures we will never get to know. You left me to try to imagine everything I will never get to know for myself and there is enough of that to fill up all my time. You placed hundreds of doors in my life and I could never see behind them, only imagine what might be there if I had the ability to open the door. You just comes in and out of my life and there is no possibility of me ever being the same. What might else be out there? What might I be missing? What will I never get to see? ”

You shake your head, a thin sad smile on your face as you speak for the first time about everything you had been holding in. You had never spoken to anyone about this, never really let those questions even be verbalized but you couldn’t help the curiosity that was ingrained in you.

You couldn’t help but imagine it all… and the very fact that you would never know had threatened to drive you insane.

He was quiet for a moment, lip pinched together as if he was considering what you said. Maybe it was a new concept for him. Maybe he was just now realizing that he had shattered any hope of you living a normal life now.

“Not that I would want it any differently, Doctor. I am glad you saved me. I still owe you my life. I just can’t help wondering about everything I don’t know.” You smile again, shaking your head.

“What if you didn’t have to wonder anymore?” He asked after a minute, looking up at you calmly as he shook himself out of his thoughts.

“I’m not quite sure what you mean. I can’t just shut it off,” You slowly say, looking that him with confusion in your eyes. The imagining, the wondering, that was simply who you were. There was no magic switch to just turn it off.

You didn’t expect him to actually laugh at your words but he did.

“Oh, I don’t want you to shut it off. Goodness no,” He laugh increased as he raised a hand to cover his mouth. “Curiosity in humans… one of the most amazing things about you all. I would never ask you to just stop being curios. It would be like me asking you to stop being human.” The Doctor seemed to find this whole thing amusing. You on the other hand, were confused.

“Then what were you asking, Doctor?” You question, raising your own eyebrow as you frown. If he didn’t want you to stop being curious… what had he meant?

“What if you didn’t have to wonder about what was out there anymore? What if you could see it, be in it, live it?” He asked, voice flattening as his smile grew serious. He looked utterly calm in those moments and almost nervous. “What if you came with me? You could see it all. You wouldn’t have to wonder about it if you could see it.”

You stare at in utter silence, mouth open as you process his words. It took a minute but the words began to set in. He was asking you to come with him, wasn’t he? He was… Oh god, he was.

“You mean…”

“Yah.”

You breath in slowly before letting out your breath in a whoosh of “Oh god, yes.” You wanted to go. Your life here was nothing to compare with what this man might show you, with what you might see. You could stop imagining what was out there. You could live it. Yes. Yes a hundred and one times yes.

The Doctor’s face had grown from serious to ecstatic in two seconds flat. His lips returned to that grin that seemed to swallow up his entire face and he reached to grab your hand, pulling you along instantly off the path as you stumble forward. Before he had appeared, you hadn’t noticed the TARDIS parked in the trees to your right. It had been too far off the path for it to draw your attention to where it was. Now, however, your eyes pinpoint it quickly and your breath pulls into your lungs again sharply. He is still dragging you forward by your hand but you are almost glad for the insistent pulling. Otherwise you would be stuck in place, unable to move or breathe as you stare at the blue public call box. This is real. There was a hand gripping your own that told you as much.

You could stop wondering about what was out there. You could stop dreaming about seeing the stars because you would get to see them. The Doctor was offering you full access pass to it all.

The door to the TARDIS was pushed open and you stepped into the bigger on the inside room with excitement sparking from every part of your body. This was real. This was most certainly real… and it was all you could have hoped for.

The Doctor’s arms opened wide as he stood before you with a childlike grin. “All of the universe to discover, all of time at your fingertips. No more wondering for you. Now…where would you like to start?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 2 of all of this. Written because someone on DA asked for it


End file.
